im ashamed.
1:54 PM Edit This 0 Comments »
Hello, its been a while. i planned to come back when i got back on track, which has unfortunately not happened yet. im so off track, im so off track i cant even make a joke about it!
so i was 102 before christmas break started, which i thought was going to make it EASIER for me to lose weight, instead my weight kept going up and up..and up..and up. (i was binging and purging like 3 times a day) it went down a couple times but not as much as it went up. i am now noticably fatter and weight around 113 im assuming. oh yes ladies and gentleman im back there!
fuck. i always thought "no way i will be over 110 again", as 110 was my first goal weight, and you know how it is, once you get below your first goal weight you never want to go past it again. basically i binged on carbs,chocolate, and just really high in fat and sugar and calories. i dont think i ever ate dinner once, which probobly caused me to binge on all the junk food. i had things like brownies,cakes,muffins,cupcakes,those snacks you buy at the grocery stores, joe louis, lots of bread, rice cakes, PEANUT BUTTER!
jars of peanut butter. it was insane.ive decided to come back because i thought "if i blog again it might be able to help me get on track"
To tell you the truth half the reason i binged so much was because i smoked weed a few times. hmm. i planned to start a 3 day fast today then stay under 100 calories, i, of course, ruined it already. i had portuguese stew (small bowl), 2 half moons (190 cals each) 1 pancake, and 1 cinnamon bun (200 calories). see CARBS AND FAT AN CALORIES AND SUGAR! but believe it or not that was probably the smallest amount Ive eaten in weeks. so its only 5pm i ate all that about an hour ago, i plan to get back into the habit of excersising, so im going on the treadmill and playing my wii fit in a little bit for a long time. ive just been really lazy lately, eating to much and not excersising at all!
i was reading my earlier wall posts/threads on the Whyeat forum. when i first joined i dropped weight really easily, i never binged, i stayed under 100 calories all the time, i fasted for a week almost every 3 days. NOT EVEN KIDDING. how i did it is beyond me. it was only a few months ago which is so odd! im hoping tomorrow i can get back into that habit an drop this extra weight and hopefully get into the 90s for once!
[b] so my plan for tomorrow [/b] : NO FOOD
[b] the next day [/b] : NO FOOD
[b] the one after that [/b] : NO FOOD.
can i do it? i honestly believe i can. i have a secret trick/supplement that usually helps me out, it helps me get back into the fasting/restricting. SO! i am doing a 3 day fast, and after that it going to kind of be a "go with the flow" kind of thing, if i want to fast i will fast, if i want to eat i will only eat a salad (just lettuce) with vinegar and black pepper. but i wont over do the salads.
so wish me luck im going to need it. i dont want to let anyone down, and i sure as hell ont want to get fat again! or should i say fatTER. i hope to be down to atleast 108 again by the end of the week. or earlier.
peace and love.
so i was 102 before christmas break started, which i thought was going to make it EASIER for me to lose weight, instead my weight kept going up and up..and up..and up. (i was binging and purging like 3 times a day) it went down a couple times but not as much as it went up. i am now noticably fatter and weight around 113 im assuming. oh yes ladies and gentleman im back there!
fuck. i always thought "no way i will be over 110 again", as 110 was my first goal weight, and you know how it is, once you get below your first goal weight you never want to go past it again. basically i binged on carbs,chocolate, and just really high in fat and sugar and calories. i dont think i ever ate dinner once, which probobly caused me to binge on all the junk food. i had things like brownies,cakes,muffins,cupcakes,those snacks you buy at the grocery stores, joe louis, lots of bread, rice cakes, PEANUT BUTTER!
jars of peanut butter. it was insane.ive decided to come back because i thought "if i blog again it might be able to help me get on track"
To tell you the truth half the reason i binged so much was because i smoked weed a few times. hmm. i planned to start a 3 day fast today then stay under 100 calories, i, of course, ruined it already. i had portuguese stew (small bowl), 2 half moons (190 cals each) 1 pancake, and 1 cinnamon bun (200 calories). see CARBS AND FAT AN CALORIES AND SUGAR! but believe it or not that was probably the smallest amount Ive eaten in weeks. so its only 5pm i ate all that about an hour ago, i plan to get back into the habit of excersising, so im going on the treadmill and playing my wii fit in a little bit for a long time. ive just been really lazy lately, eating to much and not excersising at all!
i was reading my earlier wall posts/threads on the Whyeat forum. when i first joined i dropped weight really easily, i never binged, i stayed under 100 calories all the time, i fasted for a week almost every 3 days. NOT EVEN KIDDING. how i did it is beyond me. it was only a few months ago which is so odd! im hoping tomorrow i can get back into that habit an drop this extra weight and hopefully get into the 90s for once!
[b] so my plan for tomorrow [/b] : NO FOOD
[b] the next day [/b] : NO FOOD
[b] the one after that [/b] : NO FOOD.
can i do it? i honestly believe i can. i have a secret trick/supplement that usually helps me out, it helps me get back into the fasting/restricting. SO! i am doing a 3 day fast, and after that it going to kind of be a "go with the flow" kind of thing, if i want to fast i will fast, if i want to eat i will only eat a salad (just lettuce) with vinegar and black pepper. but i wont over do the salads.
so wish me luck im going to need it. i dont want to let anyone down, and i sure as hell ont want to get fat again! or should i say fatTER. i hope to be down to atleast 108 again by the end of the week. or earlier.
peace and love.
0 comments:
Post a Comment