Sosic of seeing fat.

ok well, i just want to apologize for my last few posts lol. im not sure why, but i do.
anyways, i have been drinking constantly lately, and purging atleast 4 times a day, NO BINGING, just purging! what ever goes in, has to come out, i guess you could say im eating "normally" again (minus the purging) well not 100% normally, i usually go all day without eating, then eat whatever everyone else ate for dinner at around 7-8pm when no one is watching (suddenly i cant even chew gum infront of people) and then i purge it up, i have still been slacking on my exercise, i want to go on my treadmill tonight, i might throw on my sauna suit then go on for atleast 20 minutes, ive been really tired lately.
Tomorrow im changing my ways lol. i would be lieing to you if i said im going to stop purging but i think im more addicted to it then i ever have been! im trying something new, im going to try just living off of "Fad Diets" but switching them up so im comfortable with them.
Tomorrow im starting the "Lazy Zone Diet" lol, it was number one on the list. The original way to do it for the first day is:

Day 1:
Breakfast:
1 Meal replacement bar (pick your favorite, the Zone bar would seem appropriate but others (slim fast, power-bar, balance bar, Cliff Bar, Bag of M&M's (just kidding about the M&Ms))
2. Coffee, diet pop, whatever else but no sugar or creamer.

Lunch:
1. Lean Cuisine Meal
2. 1 slice of cheeze

Dinner:
1. Quarter Pounder or Grilled Chicken Sandwich - neither with mayonaise (from McDonalds)
2. Side Salad
3. Fat Free Dressing


Sounds more like a fucking all you can eat buffet to me lolol. i am going to do THIS instead:


Day 1:
Breakfast:
1 Bottle of water.

Lunch:
1 Slice of cheese
2 Soda Crackers (MAYBE)

Dinner:
Salad. Just lettuce, Vinegar and Black Pepper as Dressing.
1 Slice of Cheese (MAYBE)



So yes lol. thats my plan for tomorrow, im trying to also get back into the habit of keeping track of my food, and planning ahead i weighed in at 110lbs (YUCK) and i want to get down to atleast 105 by the 31 of january, 5lbs. pretty realistic i suppose. water weight or not, i just want to see the number 105 on the scale!

so peace and love everyone! wish me luck.