Sosic of seeing fat.

with my wii fit!
i know for a fact this BRILLIANT invention will help me get to my second goal weight. that is if i control my binging.
today i binged and purged AGAIN. seems like ive been doing that a lot lately. my weight is up to 108. FROM STUPID MIA! i never thought i would say this but:
"ANA I WANT YOU BACK!"

so tomorrow im goingv to welcome her back and kick mia out. that hoe.
i have my entire planned day tomorrow. but i will tell you that later. back to today. i binged and binged and purged had maybe a little under 1300 calories thats just a very rough estimated guess. i know ive been saying i havent been to upset about it lately but gah now its just getting extremely frusturating. so as i said i purged. i havent eaten since maybe 6:30 ish... its now 11:14. ive had a green tea and ice cold water. im going to drink a laxative tea later and play my wii fit for the rest of the night. Gee. insomnia is going to be handy tonight! i will probobly be up till 5 am working out.
ive played for about 40 minutes and burned almost 300 calories. woohoo.
tomorrow im going to buy the game "The Biggest Loser" and play that more aswell.

so as i said.
since my weight is up to a gross 108. im going to quickly smarten up and restrict restrict restrict before im back up to a dreaded 110. i always promised myself "NEVER go over 108. its unacceptable now"
funny how before 110 was like "holy shit! woohoo" now 108 is like "BULLSHIT!"
im sure ive said that already.
anywho. my meal plan for tomorrow.. or should i say liquid plan is.
right when i wake up i will make myself a nice warm green tea. then for lunch a bottle of water. then for dinner, a bottle of water. of course if im still on number 1 i wont drink another till im done. and depending on the time im done that i will either have a)diet soda or b)water. Then around 11ish i will have another green tea and then 30 mins later i will have a laxative tea.
and then WII WII WII all night long again.
i HIGHLY recommend getting a wii fit if your to lazy to exercise like me :) sure its pretty expensive but theres always EBAY! :) or Kijiji. lol.

this is a little off the "wii topic" but as some of you may know im in my last year of highschool. and i was planning on taking a year off to travel and such. but now ive decided to go to college right after highschool and get my own apartment. and guess why? because i was thinking "if i live on my own...i can starve starve starve. and not even have to buy food untill absoloutley necessary..." sad? pathetic? oh i know. but great idea non the less. its every ana/mia's dream.
im going to a chef teaching college thing. which may or may not be the best idea lmao. but we will find out :)
or i may go for psychology. but i honestly dont think im "smart enough" i dont have the highest marks. but honestly. all the stuff they teach you in school is useless. who are they to tell me im not smart enough to be what i want to be! im going to prove them wrong by the way. i know i have the street smarts. the PROPER intelligence to help people mentally.
so people! if someone tells you cant do it. prove those mother fuckers wrong. that can go for either jobs, or being thin!

now two quotes. one about my outlook on school and one about thinness.
school:
"The bell rings and the caddle moves from room to room every 70 minutes, im all for learning, just not exactly WHAT they want me to learn or HOW they want me to learn it. im an autodidact. Theres a whole world of knowledge and experience out there, things you dont learn in school. thats what im intrested in"
Ana:
"Mirrors lie to me, tell me you can see, maybe you wont be able to recognize me now."

i really hope i dont fuck up this time.
GO AWAY MIA! your nothing but a greedy fat pig! and i HATE YOU. i fucking hate you ...